decisons

by **thaya** » Sun Aug 26, 2007 10:04 pm

I have 12 hours to decide whether to fly back to england or not. should i follow my head or my heart? I've spent the last 4 weeks wondering what to do. My head says go home, quit your job, stay with a friend till you get yourself sorted. My heart says forget the flight, no one's going to bother looking for you, you could disappear in Hawaii and live in a tent or something. If I do come home I want to quit my job asap and just deal with the consequences. I still can't make my mind up. Going home and turning my life upside down could be a big mistake and I might regret it. Staying here and ignoring financial responsibilities could also be a big mistake. I think I need to go and sit under my favourite palm tree and do some more thinking.

Here's a pic of me and Josh taken yesterday at the Duke fest. There was a surf comp going on in the background.

Another one of us at the beach (I'm trying not to get sunburnt!)

You can probably make out my sky-diving bruise :roll:

I now have about 8 more all down one leg from wipeouts and other stuff. It looks really odd :oops:

Life out here is just so amazing. The weather is great every day (although a little bit too hot) the ocean isnt cold, I can surf in a bikini and I'm loving it. I don't want it to end.

by **SDCali** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 12:52 am

This is something you really need to think about. (my answers in parenthesis)
Do you have a lot of debt/obligations back home? (Yes, over $40,000 student loans, $12,000 car loan outstanding currently)
Would you really be happy with endless summer and lots of warm rain? (of course, went to San Diego and got some warm rain today)
Have you talked to Hawaiisucks?
Have you gone to the Department of Education on Oahu, since you are qualified to teach in England, I don't know how much work it would be for you to get a job there, substituting at least to make some money to live on. (researched, they require letters from prior school employment, as well as several other things, I'm waiting to finish my Master's degree, as it may make it a lot easier for me to get a job ie. less classes to take to qualify for Hawaii teaching license.)
How long have you been at your new job, have you given it a chance, is it providing what your previous job was lacking? (currently looking for a new job, after resigning from prior job--commute was too long, they did not really want me back there, so need new challenges)
I never want to leave when it is time to go, but I know I will be back (only later this year, still struggling with that).
I am going to wait at least another year (more debts paid off and degree completed), and as long as 5 years to move over there, but not much more unless something changes in my life.

by **isaluteyou** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 2:11 am

Like the stones said "you can't allways get what you want, but if you try sometime you might find, you get what you need" :lol:

Sometimes what you want is not a benificial to your character - Think about that :wink:

by **RJD** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 2:50 am

Thaya you have the right to live and work in Hawaii ?

If not dont fk with US immigration, come back and sort it out. Actualy always best to sort stuff out at home, it will end up biting you in the ass otehrwise.

by **Hang11** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 4:09 am

^^^What he said - a mate of mine overstayed his visa in the US, got kicked out in the end, cost him thousands of pounds with a lawyer, and months of hassle to get let back in.

If you've got a long term visa or work permit or whatever, then fair enough, but if you are just gutted that it's the end of your trip, go back home, and sort it out properly so you can really get back there and live, work, etc etc. It might seem hard in the short term, but I reckon you would end up regretting it otherwise.

by **northswell** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:35 am

We have all had those hols you don't want to end.

Come home get a reality check, then decide.

by **Ed McDead** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 1:59 pm

Couple of general things which I've learned from my own experience

Get lots of views and then make up your own mind

No decision is for ever - don't feel trapped by what you decide

by **rich r** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 3:19 pm

Yeah, the visa thing is the big one. Sort that out, then go back.

by **Sar** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:34 pm

ah Thaya!! its great that you had a fantastic holiday!! really truely pleased!! :thumbs:

Come home, decide what you want and then find out what you need to do to achieve that goal. Dont forget that the country you see on holiday is sometimes very different from the country you would live in!.....if its fantasic and what you want - DO NOT LET ANYTHING STAND IN YOUR WAY!! - no matter how long it may take - GO FOR IT.....and hook up with the hottie in the pics :wink:

.....nice dress by the way - really like it

by **greg@hoodatsurfco** » Mon Aug 27, 2007 11:57 pm

take care of your responsibilities back home.. then get a working permit for the US.

Although I personally cannot imagine why anyone would want to live here over some other countries.. I am pretty fed up with a lot of the BS. I can't even goto another country without being frowned on just for being American and the image that comes with it.

by **Otter** » Tue Aug 28, 2007 2:20 am

Screw it all! Live the life of a surf bum! You don'e need cold weather, bosses that suck, bills coming in, mortgage payments, car payments, insurance bills, cold weather, cold water and cold people. Stay where it's warm and you can enjoy life. LIFE'S TO SHORT TO MESS WITH THE CHICKEN STUFF!! You're good looking, find a boyfriend to do that carp for ya! Live a life of ease is my advice. I'm trying...

I'm an old guy, so I can tell you, it will pass by really quickly, even the bad times. Live where it's nice and warm, the locals are friendly, and money is not that important.

by **RJD** » Tue Aug 28, 2007 3:56 am

Untill you get picked up by Immigration and deported. Then the partys over.

by **greg@hoodatsurfco** » Tue Aug 28, 2007 9:20 am

^^^exactly.. and thats when the reaaaalll fun starts!

by **hawaiiSUCKSexceptsurf** » Tue Sep 04, 2007 10:12 am

SDCali wrote:Have you talked to Hawaiisucks?

thats funny.
i met her, we got along ok but different humor and i had too much energy.

about the teaching thing, im not sure if this is how it is in other places, but i go to UH and wanted to major in elementary ed. and talked to too many people who were fed up with how full of crap the whole DOE here is, they gave it up.

im thinking of changing my name to hawaiisucksexceptsurfingandhiking. or maybe hawaiiisreallyawesomeexceptwhenitssohotyoudontwanttodojackshit. i think youd have to live here to get that last one. thaya probably gets it. ill spell it out just it case. its always hot.

so did thaya go home? what is she planning to do?

by **Stone Fox** » Tue Sep 04, 2007 2:12 pm

Life's short. Enjoy it while you can, but don't be stupid, make sure you CAN stay without getting in trouble. You've got 12 hours? Make some calls, find out about staying visas, jobs etc, then when you know if you CAN stay - make the decision.

If you do stay, you can always get someone to store / ship your stuff for you.

by **drowningbitbybit** » Tue Sep 04, 2007 2:36 pm

Getting a work visa and moving to another country is really very easy and I recommend that everyone does it without any thought whatsoever. If you can cut corners and do it on a tourist visa then even better. I mean, how hard can it be? :roll:

by **thaya** » Tue Sep 04, 2007 7:56 pm

well, I'm back :cry:

the decision I was making was really whether to stay another two months (which legally I could have) to have more time to decide whether to try and move there permanently... although the option of dissappearing in a tent did seem quite appealing for a while. If I did stay I knew I could forget ever teaching again, as it would be really unprofessional to ring up my school from Hawaii and say I'm not coming back, but then I'd already decided I didn't want to teach anymore... so would it really matter? The visa wouldn't be too much of a problem as I've always known that as my dad is american i can apply for dual citizenship - which I guess is like a golden ticket!

The four and a half weeks I spent there changed my life. I feel so lucky to have had such a great experience, even if it was too hot to be hiking midday :oops:

. a big thanks to hawaiisucks for an awesome hike and spectacular views & apologies for not being able to walk any further :oops:

my toe was really starting to throb (the one I dislocated :roll:

) and it was REALLY hot!!!!

It wasn't just the place, the lifestyle, the sunshine etc. I went through a really deep inner journey of self discovery (I know that sounds corney but it's the only way of describing it) and met someone who has quite literally changed my life forever. I feel totally different in myself, and my whole attitude. It's kinda personal, so I'm not really going to go into it, but I realised a whole lot of things while I was out there and it made me realised just how unhappy I am with certain things back in England.

It's time to change alot of stuff...

I've put my "sensible" head on and I'm not going to rush into things, but I'm sorta setting Xmas as a deadline for a life changing decision.