The ' funny quote' thread

by **Malibu Barbie** » Fri Nov 18, 2005 8:25 am

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

:cry:

!!!

Oh woe is me! My heart is broken and I don't think it will ever recover...
Sob! Sob! SOB!!! I shall go and settle myself down infront of a depressing movie with an overly large tub of chocolate ice cream and cry into it...

by **oldiebeginner** » Fri Nov 18, 2005 3:50 pm

sorry to be the bearer of bad news Malibu B, but it was either sailing to the warmth of S.America...or sailing to be "stranded with no sea in a village full of oldies" :wink:

p.s what age do you call an oldie?

by **Malibu Barbie** » Mon Nov 21, 2005 8:21 am

6 tubs of ice cream later...(yes, I AM kidding, I hasten to add!)

Ok, I admit that's a slightly less attractive prospect...but STILL!! As if bieng stuck here wasn't already bad enough for me, now I'm broken hearted on top of that!! Sob! Wail! Ahem. I'll get over it...maybe...

What age do I class as an oldie?!! Yeah, when I mean I'm in a village full of them, I really do mean properly old...I'm guessing the average age of the people in my village is about 80! So I doubt you need to be a'worryin' just yet!!

x

by **sinistapenguin** » Mon Nov 21, 2005 11:03 am

MB - I'm sure you could come up with creative ways of entertaining him!

especially with 6 tubs of Icecream!!

by **CheeZee** » Mon Nov 21, 2005 1:22 pm

whoa , whoa whoa .. and i said WHOA !! :lol:

CheeZee not set sail for anywherez .. not without a full compliment of various'ly infflicted deck hands ( mental or otherwise accepted :twisted:

) ...

I'm just chillin off shore watching cyber mermaids leap outta the water and wondering which ones actually exist and which ones dont ! .. " The internet is a strange ocean my friends :wink:

" Maddy ... we should have discussed a secret sign or something so i coulda snuck on shore and rescued you from an ... an ... injection !?! :shock:

...
" damn you HAVE been playing with pirates " lolol .. You better have scurvy and nothing else or Jack Sparraa is gonna have words with you young lady :lol:

by **CheeZee** » Mon Nov 21, 2005 1:25 pm

lmao ... Sin' : ... Yes my bro' there is a helllaaaaa lot of pursuading that can be done with six large tubs of ice-cream !

" in fact ... maddy if you just trail the first five down the aisle ..im there baby :wink:

by **Malibu Barbie** » Mon Nov 21, 2005 2:46 pm

Heeeeey! There y'are!

They all had me worried you'd up and left me! I mean...I was gonna SAY!! Honestly, you love me while I have exciting South America stories to tell you and then when I've run out of them you dump me for the real thing...It's not fair! Tee hee! I've just about stopped crying now...My little village had almost turned into a village full of oldies WITH sea!! :lol:

Anyhoo, turns out I didn't need rescuing anyway as the needle in the arm wasn't that bad (oooh, that sounds like I was getting a Jack stylee tattoo!) and it was for MMR...No I don't have measles, mumps OR rubella but it was enforced upon me just incase. So technicallyi could still get scurvy... Ooh argh! Ahem.

So yay! You haven't abandoned me...Ice cream all round then, and a Bolivian style sponaneous fuel-drinkin', pipe playin' street partAY!! Wooh!

x

by **sinistapenguin** » Mon Nov 21, 2005 3:32 pm

MMR?

Are you only 18 months old? If so you type well and have a fairly mature attitude towards the more adult subtleties of conversation!!

by **Malibu Barbie** » Mon Nov 21, 2005 3:44 pm

Yes, that's right...I'm just a child prodigy!! Ha ha. No, as I'm sure you already know anyway from my rather excited post a couple of weeks back, I'm a big grown up adult now at 18 - we just got made to have top up jab things...

by **oldiebeginner** » Mon Nov 21, 2005 4:10 pm

Malibu B, sorry for all the tears and vast quantities of ice cream...must have seen the wrong pirate ship sailing for S. America

oh well...

by **mai** » Tue Nov 22, 2005 8:41 pm

I guess we are all in the same boat ! let's rescue Malibu Barbie from that village stranded with old people :wink:

and plss leave some chocolate ice cream for me

funny quote:
Homer: I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to speed around a city, keeping its speed over fifty and if its speed dropped, it would explode! I think it was called ... "The Bus That Couldnt Slow Down."

cheers

by **Malibu Barbie** » Wed Nov 23, 2005 8:34 am

Yay! Actually, if you all come to my village then it wouldn't be full of old people any more...

by **CheeZee** » Thu Nov 24, 2005 10:19 am

... i was a bit slow on this baby !

and plss leave some chocolate ice cream for me Cool

... yes please leave some for you ..... to share :twisted:

by **Sam777** » Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:41 pm

A hilarious selection from the movie 'Snatch'

"Avi: Tony.
Bullet Tooth Tony: What?
Avi: Look in the dog.
Bullet Tooth Tony: What do you mean?
Avi: I mean open him up.
Bullet Tooth Tony: It's not as if it's a tin of baked beans! What do you mean "open him up"?

Policeman: So, what you doin here?
Turkish: I'm taking the dog for a walk. What's the problem?
Policeman: What's in the car?
Turkish: Seats and a steering wheel.

[Tony empties his gun through the wall, hitting both Boris and Tyrone. He comes in, reloading]
Bullet Tooth Tony: What's Boris doing here? Boris, what are you doing here?
Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: F**k you!
[Tony shoots him twice, then turns to Tyrone]
Bullet Tooth Tony: Where's the case?
Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: Uhhh, you piece of crap...
Bullet Tooth Tony: Don't take the piss, Boris.
Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: [reaching for his gun] I show you...
[Tony shoots him four more times]
Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: F**k you!
[a seventh time]
Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: Almost had it...
Bullet Tooth Tony: For f**k's sake...
[Tony takes careful aim and fires an eighth shot. Sound of Boris finally collapsing]

Turkish: For ever action, there is a reaction. And a Pikey reaction... is quite a f**king thing.

Avi: Should I call you Bullet? Tooth?
Bullet Tooth Tony: You can call me Susan if it makes you happy

Bullet Tooth Tony: Boris the Blade? As in Boris the Bullet-Dodger?
Avi: Why do they call him the Bullet-Dodger?
Bullet Tooth Tony: 'Cause he dodges bullets, Avi.

by **^*^BATMAN^*^** » Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:12 pm

I have to applaud you. You almost revived a 2 year old post. Right now it is only 1 year and 10 months.

by **Sam777** » Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:53 pm

Gets my number of posts up

by **Sillysausage** » Mon Aug 13, 2007 7:15 pm

lol yeah fair doooos dude, that is a long load of posts to go through to find that

by **Otter** » Tue Aug 14, 2007 3:41 am

What we have here...

...is failure to communicate.

by **CheeZee** » Tue Aug 14, 2007 3:04 pm

indeed indeed ... a round of :clap:

for Sam , as this was one of my favourite threads which kinda slipped away !

good on ya Sam

by **CheeZee** » Tue Aug 14, 2007 4:10 pm

quoted from my bud Bob's written police interview regarding a motoring offence which resulted in him totalling his car in someones garden ...

Bob: .. " i was travelling at apprx 32mph, steering into a left hand bend .. when suddenly i left the road due to a bush that was in the way ..

Officer: .. Mr. G''' .. the bush that caused you to leave the road , was in the road?

Bob ... No , that's what confused me ....

" i swear that was read out in court ..i had to leave the room ... fleshing great :lol:

The ' funny quote' thread

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